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I like knowing myself. I really do. Yesterday I was so off, so out of it, that I knew there was something wrong. I don’t normally get so blah feeling. I don’t normally feel like my words don’t matter – usually I know as long as they matter to me, that’s enough. And it was odd, as soon as I closed the computer and pouted around the apartment, it hit me. I didn’t feel so hot.

Yep, getting sick. Not your typical cold/flu sick, but bronchial sick. All of a sudden (and I do mean just like that, out of the blue), my lungs started to ache and I started to wheeze. I have to tell you, I was almost relieved to have something upon which to pin my case of the mean-reds. THAT was why I was in such a horrible mood. Oh, okay.

So I didn’t go anywhere, I didn’t go to the nursery, I just crawled onto the couch with a blanket and my mindless Noro knitting and watched TiVo all morning and into the early afternoon. Know what I watched? Oh, man. Can I really admit this? I watched like four episodes of The Real World, San Diego. I know. But it was perfect.

Then, of course, I had to get up and go to work. Not only was there political drama at the department, but I got stuck working a ten hour shift instead of the 4-6 hours I was originally scheduled for. But it was fine, it got done, and the political storm turned into a mild breeze. I felt sick, but hung in there. I found the DayQuil I always keep in my locker, and I was grateful to the gods that be that I’m so well stocked. Three hours later, I was complaining that they just don’t make DayQuil like they used to. “I don’t feel any better. I think that stuff might have expired or something. Damn.” *cough cough* About an hour later I found the two gelcaps still in my pocket. Yep. Drugs often work when you REMEMBER to take them. Uh-huh.

Got poor sleep (Rachel-with-no-a, that’s partially your fault – you SO owe me a beer the next time you see me – so glad you’re okay, darlin’), but today I have NOTHING to do until this evening when I have a splendid night out in the City planned with splendid people. I had toyed with the idea of doing all that backyard-planting curtain-making white-light-stringing stuff today, but screw it. I have hours more Queer as Folk captured on TiVo, and I’m staving off bronchitis. Just the ticket, don’tcha think?

Thanks for the wonderful, adorable, loving comments yesterday. I appreciate each and every single one. Man, I’m in a better mood today. Whew.

Feeling rather blah today. I hate feeling blah. I keep asking myself why I feel this way, since it’s the middle of the weekend, and it’s going to be a gorgeous day, and then I keep remembering: I have to work this afternoon/evening. Overtime. WHY did I agree to that? Ugh. I don’t have to go in until 3pm, but it’s going to shadow my whole morning.

I’m just feeling a little off. My brain isn’t working right. A moment ago I just had a bright thought – I’ll take myself out to breakfast and then to the nursery! Yeah! Then I remembered I just ate breakfast. Dang, damn, dang. I traded a potential bacon and eggs breakfast for a bowl of Cheerios because I’m thinking backwards.

I bought fabric for curtains yesterday. But I don’t feel like sewing. I also worked on the garden a bit and hung my FOUNTAIN! Did I tell you about that? (Just the thought of it cheers me up.) Mom and I went to a funky nursery last week, with odd bits of statuary and old fountains everywhere. This particular guy had a price of $217 written on the back, but he’d been hanging around the nursery for a long time, it was obvious. His basin was kinda sludgy and he had been turned off. So the guy working the counter called the boss and then said, “Is thirty-nine okay?” Shrug. Yeah, I guess. Inside I was twirling with delight. I had been going to make an Italian-like fountain, but that would have taken time and even more money than this cost. And this guy, oh, he’s Italian all right. Just look:

I need to get some rocks for the basin, since right now, he LOOKS good, but he runs so smoothly that there’s no splashing sound, thus defeating the whole Fountain Idea.

I bought some plants for the garden, too, but I really need to talk to my front-unit neighbors, and soon. When I was thinking about moving in, they mentioned that they’d like to use my backyard to store a shed for their bikes. I was waiting for the landlord out front, hadn’t even seen the backyard, and agreed that of course, if I moved here, it wouldn’t be a problem. I’ve been here a month and no shed has appeared, making me wonder if they’ve come up with an alternate solution. That would be fabulous, because I’ve in the meantime become very jealous with my garden. It’s mine. I don’t want to share. And I didn’t know about the sliding glass door then, either, and didn’t understand that if they did put an ugly ole shed there, they’d be looking right into my home every time they went back there.

Looking up at this entry, I’m a little grumpy again. I feel like I just ramble and babble on about things that don’t have any earthly interest for another human soul. Who CARES about a bike shed in my backyard, ‘cept for me.

I think I’m dehydrated. Must. Drink. Water. Wish I didn’t have to work. Bleah. I think I’ll go buy a few more plants.

And a shot of Adah. She’d cheer anyone up, I think.

When I’m tired, I’m such a dumb-ass that I scare myself. Yesterday work sucked. Big time. The phones are being upgraded. Unfortunately, that meant they weren’t working well, if at all, for most of the day. Imagine a 911/police department communication center without working phones. I got so stressed out that I went beyond stress and entered this amused zen zone. I just giggled. The new 911 ring-tone sounds like that Close Encounters tone, and it cracked me up every time it rang. Boo-bee-boo-BOO!

Worked overtime, too. And trained all day on the radio, on a really busy day. I was driving home when I realized I had my cell phone open and to my ear. I had been holding it to my ear for at least seven blocks. There was no one there, it hadn’t rung, and I hadn’t dialed anyone. I was just listening. This was so funny to me that I called work (hoping they’d be able to answer) and while I was waiting at the stoplight for Brandy to answer, the guy behind me honked for me to go. I looked up to see if I’d missed the green light. I WAS AT A STOP SIGN. Not a light. And I only go through that intersection eight times a week. So when Brandy picked up the phone, it was to the sound of honking and a maniacal giggle.

I came home and didn’t sleep. No, that would have taken the fun out of my sleepy-high. Instead, I sat on my couch and went through all the ring-tones that I had downloaded to my new-fangled cell phone. Oh, my god. The choice! But technology hasn’t quite caught up yet, at least not with the $79 (upgrade) phones from Verizon. You can download almost any popular song, but each one sounds like it’s being played by some guy with stringy dark hair playing his 1985 electronic keyboard in his mother’s basement in Bakersfield. Pretty much only Coldplay and 80s pop/techno tunes sound good. And if I had Coldplay as my ringtone, I’d…. I’d….. Well, I wouldn’t be me. Let’s just say that.

But 80s tunes, hey. Let’s talk. I could NOT decide between Depeche Mode, the Cure, and A-ha. Oh, the Psychedelic Furs were in the running, too. (And my GAWKs, Cannonball was way up there, but sounded kinda stoopid. Must stick with 80s electronica.) Finally went with “Close to Me” by the Cure. Upbeat. A little silly. With that nostalgic I-wore-Madonna-bracelets-and-I-know-you-did-too kind of thing goin’ on. I would call myself, just for a thrill, but my home phone decided to break today. Lord.

It’s the (my) weekend! Yow!

It’s going to be at least a week before I get the new color Koigu Kersti from darling Rob, which will be a closer match to my dye-lot, hopefully. I love Cromarty. I adore Alice Starmore. But hell, I’m tired of eensy cables. I started the Retro Prep (see IndiGirl Amy for fab examples of this one) in Noro 55, that stone beach colorway. It’s the most muted Noro I’ve ever worked with and I’m in love. TOO excited that I’m going to be doing miles of stockinette. Could not be happier.

I actually cast it on Saturday night, knowing that I’d be training for the next four working days (SMFS). This is the same trainee that I had about four months ago. I got her at the beginning, when she knew nothing. Police dispatch is such a ridiculously detailed, difficult job that it usually takes 4-6 months to learn, and it’s a slow learning curve. At the beginning, I talked all day. I had four weeks of just talking. Just teaching. I never knew you could talk for ten hours at a time, teaching, and still have a million more things you’ll never cover. You’ll never go over every contingency, every emergency, every way things can go wrong. But she’s back with me now, an (almost) proficient dispatcher, and I’m merely listening to her while she dispatches on the radio. I can’t type for her, I can’t talk for her, I can only correct her when necessary. I must have yarn in my hands for this. And I tell you, Noro in stockinette? The perfect thing to keep me from wringing my little hands together. The trainee is really doing amazingly well, but almost every dispatcher is an opinionated person who does things her way, which is, of course, the only right way. It’s SO hard to not take over when things get heated. To let her flounder a little. Oy.

I want to show you a picture of the finished front of Ms. C. But that means I have to dig out my camera, plug it in, download the snaps, choose one, resize it, save it, yadda yadda. Don’tcha just get freakin’ lazy sometimes?

Oh, all right. Hang on.

There. Here y’are:

And one for scale:

Thanks for all the condolences sent to Christy. It shows (again) the loving side of blogdom, and it means a lot to us. Really. Think of her some more if you can. It’s lonely, losing a friend like that. Love you, Christy. I’m proud of you.

The kitties are adjusting. Slowly. Digit howls a lot in the morning. Oh, does he howl. Oh, do I howl back. But in the old place, they were NOT buddies. Occasionally Digit would accidentally sit next to Adah and then think better of the choice. When they’re at my Mom’s house, however, they’re the best of pals. Any friend in enemy territory, I guess. I’m going to try to foster that here. It may mean letting Adah outside sometimes, along with Digit, even though I hate to do that. She has a bad habit of moving in with other families without asking. She doesn’t care who loves her, as long as someone does. Slut.

But in this new territory, they’re still pals. I love this one:

They’re sleeping, by George.

Ha!

And this one’s good, too:

And in the next one, they’re bonding over their inability to KILL THAT HUMMINGBIRD that’s just outside the screen.

And I had to get a new cell phone for embarrassing reasons like
1) discovering that tile floor really IS that hard
2) needing to get a phone number off old, broken phone (Verizon dumps your old numbers into your new phone – tell me your cell phone isn’t your real phone book, too).
So, while I was there, I upgraded for $79 to the photo phone. I know it’s crap quality, I’ll be kicking myself when the technology’s better (in about thirteen minutes or so) but here’s one of the first snaps:

So, as you see, my kits are doing well. BUT-

RIP Sebastian

My sister Christy’s kitty Sebastian, however, had to go over the Rainbow Bridge on Wednesday. He was a rescue kitty – Christy adopted him from a vet’s back room. He had been dropped off and never picked up. Bastards. But their loss was her gain. He was just shy of nineteen years old. She loved loved loved loved him so much that she made up for the time he had spent in that little box waiting for his new, loving mama.

With her permission, I give you the email she sent family and friends. I was going to paraphrase it, but she says it just right. I daren’t change a word.

Hi friends- I am sad because yesterday I had my little kitty Sebastian put to sleep. he became really sick pretty quickly, until he could not longer sit up or hold up his head, so instead of more expensive vet treatments that were not likely to prolong his life more than a few days, I made the very hard decision that he had lived his life and it was time to go. Thank you all for being so kind and nice, and for caring about my little kitty. I only had him for a year and he was in pretty beat-up shape when I got him, but he was a darned good cat, tough as nails and sweet as pie, and I will miss him. He was probably about 20 years old. Good night, Sebastian. -Christy

* “My heart has joined the Thousand, for my friend stopped running today.” Richard Adams, Watership Down.

Home now. We had a lovely warm drive up the coast. The cats and I both do better with the top down. They don’t cry as much and just stare out of their carriers at the trees flashing by. It must seem like a really great big TV. Or maybe they’re so terrified that they can’t open their mouths to scream. I don’t think it’s that, though.

They’re prowling now. Digit is upset. But hey, he’s always upset about something, isn’t he? Adah has settled right in, and she went straight to her new scratching post and scratched it. How does she KNOW to do that?

Mom and I had a wonderful day yesterday, chock full of things neither of us had to do. The best kinds of things, like lunch at Robin’s in Cambria, sitting on their outdoor porch, avocado and melted jarlsberg on a wheat croissant…. Shopping idly at Ball and Skein, buying nothing (what is this world coming to?). Wandering up the coast a little farther, to Piedras Blancas, where the elephant seals lay out. Holy cow, I love those things. They’re just too silly looking to survive, and yet, they do. The big males are pretty darn disgusting (they can reach over nine thousand pounds), but all the moms and babies are hysterical. They yell and bawk and squish over each other, and they make me laugh.

A bunch of ’em:

One smiling:

Two smiling: