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1) Bungee-jump
2) Caulk
3) Leash a cat
3) Wash in the machine

Okay! I know.

I know! I heard you, I heard that gasp of horror.

How was I supposed to know? I thought felting happened when HEAT was applied. Even some warmth, perhaps. But in COLD water? And just a little agitation?

The secret project felted. Oh, just a little. ON ONE SIDE.

I panic-blocked it – you know the method – where you throw your whole body into the object, twisting and pulling, muttering things about gods and saints and things you wouldn’t want your grandmother to overhear. I think I managed to right it. Almost. How many times have I said I’m of the “never be noticed from a trotting horse” camp? Too many? Is this fate? Taunting me? Testing me? Seeing if I really am a tithing member of the Church of the Trotting Horse?

Well! I am! Vehemently! I’m gonna give this project away at Christmas and ride away quickly. On my trotting horse. And I’ll never be noticed.

I’m feeling better – and THANK YOU for the well-wishes. I really felt like I was on death’s doorstep there for a couple of days. It needed a good sweeping, too, I can tell you that. Back at work today, where I’m going to try to take it easy, but it’s going to be tough to train for ten hours without much of a working voice. But it’s nice to be moving around again. (Oh! Go say hi to Bethany!)

Not feeling up for much today, either. The well-wishes mean so much, though. Thank you!

Only this point:
Recently Cari had a post about the song you won’t admit to liking, even though you boogie to it in private. This is along the same line – I have a new addiction to a very embarrassing food.

You know when you’re sitting at the beach or in the park, and you see young mothers feeding their children out of those little plastic pre-stuffed child-food bags? And then you see them sneak a little something into their own mouths? In my mind, that always smacked of eating cat food somehow. It’s just not right. We’re not SUPPOSED to eat baby food.

Oh, my friend, yes. (Deep sigh) Yes, we are.

May I suggest Gerbers Graduates Fruit Juice Snacks? They’re (shhh!) awesome. They’re like gummy candy but with less stick and more sugar. They rock. I bought three boxes the other day at Target and felt a little guilty about it. I was depriving needy children of their sugar high.

Seriously. Go get some. Plus they’re rich in vitamin C. Yup. Those moms on the park bench knew what they were doing. Now you. ‘Fess up.

You know you’re sick when you can’t knit. I can’t even bear to touch anything, or have anything touch me, and the very thought of wool running through my hands makes me squirm. And that’s just too sad. A cold, sure, knit away. But this kind of flu? I want to lie in bed and never move again.

But I’m up for a minute to say: Thanks for the comments. I swear to god, I got up just to read them, to make myself feel better. And they work! I love two things when I’m sick, and two things only: 1 – taking my temperature (I have one of those electronic dealies) and 2 – getting nice notes from wonderful people who want me to feel better.

The only thing about being a grown-up and living alone is that you have to take care of yourself. It’s so easy to just let the kleenex pile up on the floor and eat nothing but vitamins and that last piece of wrapped cheese, but it does make you a little sad. Just a little. I was lying on my sofa, thinking of the good old days when my little mama would cater to me, bringing me Nilla wafers and 7-Up, and I wished for one small feverish (101.5) moment that I was little again. And you know what?

That’s when sis Christy came over bearing:
Taco Bell Mexican Pizza
7-Up
Ginger ale
Nilla wafers
Orange juice
Theraflu
Good wishes

Aren’t I luckiest? Just a little food in my tummy and a lot of love in my heart – I’ll be better in no time and knitting again. Now back to bed with me (101 even).

Not a cold. The effing flu. A good one, too. I hurt everywhere, temperature 102. Going back to bed.

This blows. I even got the flu shot – but that was 10 days ago, and it doesn’t start to protect you for 14. I never get the flu. Hyperbole. I rarely get the flu.

Bleah. (Speaking of which, my site was hit by someone who googled Bleah in Russian. That’s funny to me. Not much else is, though. Teeth chattering….)

Drumroll please….

The Hot Water Bottle Cozy’s new name is:

Bottleneck Avenger Who’sKnit (BAWK).

Thanks go out to all who helped, especially the Grammar Avenger Who Knits (GAWK), Cari.

The problem, as I told Mopsie, is the damn name of the item that goes inside the cozy (or cosy a La Brainy): Hot water bottle. Could it be a little more utilitarian, please? And if you go to Longs and ask the employees where they carry the hot water bottles, nine times out of ten you get blank stares. “You mean like a thermos?” Where did they grow up? What did their mother give them at night when they were cold? Oh. Central heating. Besides that, I mean.

I won’t attempt to rename the item (although this should happen). But hey, make a BAWK, make someone happy. (Me! The person who gets it will be happy, too, though.) I’ll be happy to email you the pattern.

Knitting Question:

This is Beth’s Boxy sweater (no relation to sister Bethany). Headless, as I had a cold that day, too.

I don’t wear it, as it turned out a little TOO boxy, too wide around. Can I just machine sew the sides closer in and cut out the excess? It’s wool, so the ends will felt a little upon washing…. Why does this sound so simple in my head? Because it sounds so easy, it must be wrong. Will I eff it up terribly if I do this? Help!

And look! I spy a finished Wave-Along! This is from Joan in Reno, and isn’t the model beautiful?

Now I’m off to have a day. I will write today, I pinky swear. I’m getting a cold, so the Tomorrow Goblin is telling me I should just knit and eat the dark-chocolate-covered cherries I bought yesterday, but no. I’ll walk to the coffee-shop and write. And then I have a surprise birthday party tonight for a co-worker’s wife, which should be fun, so I have to chase this cold away. Lots of tea and vitamin C for me. It’s only threatening right now, and my goal is to vaporize it before it grabs me (that makes it sound like a bad horror movie) (but is there a good horror movie?) (enough parentheses).

And dude, how excited am I that the first Hot Water Bottle Cozy (someone give me a better name, please!) made from my pattern was made by our very own Brainy Lady? You rock, Al!