Ep. 257: Cassandra Lane on How to Parent Yourself as a Writer

Cassandra Lane is a writer and editor based in Los Angeles. Lane received her MFA from Antioch University LA. Her stories have appeared in the New York Times’s Conception series, the Times-Picayune, the Atlanta Journal Constitution, and elsewhere. Her debut memoir We Are Bridges was published in 2021 by Feminist Press. She is editor in chief of L.A. Parent magazine and formerly served on the board of the AROHO Foundation.

Transcript:

[00:00:00] Rachael Herron: Welcome to “How do you Write?” I’m your host, Rachael Herron. On this podcast, I talk to authors about how they write, what their process is and how their lives fit together. I’ll keep each episode short so you can get back to writing.

[00:00:16] Well, Hello writers! Welcome to episode # 257 of “How do you Write?” I’m Rachael Herron. I’m so pleased with that you are here with me today as I talked to Cassandra Lane. She was absolutely smashing to talk to. And we really talk a lot about the process of writing and how to take care of yourself as a writer, even, shall we say, how to parent yourself as a writer, which I thought was a really interesting thing to talk about. So I know you will enjoy the interview and what’s going on around here? Well, we are still in lockdown in New Zealand in the Northland. But we just went from level four, which is the most extreme lockdown: you don’t go anywhere, you don’t do anything at all, except to the grocery store if you need to, to level three. Nothing changes. You still have to stay in your bubble. You still have to not go anywhere. We still can’t leave this Airbnb on the water. It’s real rough, piteous. The one thing that changes is that you can get takeout and I’m going to be able to go kayaking. Really? What else do we need? This morning it happened, we went to level three, up here. Auckland below us is still at level four. We need to drive through Auckland in order to leave this place. So we’re kind of here until Auckland goes off of level four, which is going to be about another week and a half, hopefully. Hopefully that will go down to level three and then we can move to a new apartment, which is more affordable. But in the meantime, we’re going to enjoy the crap out of this. But this morning, while my wife and I were working, I said, “Hey, you want to go get a coffee?” And we went and got the best coffee ever. She got a Cappuccino, I got a latte. We got it from a person, we went to a place, to buy a thing. It was amazing!

[00:02:11] It was so, so, so good. I’m still giddy on the fumes and the high of getting that coffee. It was wonderful. Unfortunately, I will admit, it threw me off my game, leaving the house during my writing time, getting so excited about the coffee. I have not written today. And I’ve been doing really, really well with those daily Pomodoros, getting my work done, and I haven’t done it yet. So, I’ve got a little bit of guilt and a little bit of angst around it. So, I will be getting that done after I upload this. I apologize for the days recently where it hasn’t gone out on a Friday, or it has come out on Saturday or even I think one came out on the Sunday. I can’t keep my day straight, even though I’m a day ahead of the United States. My brain is all confused and it just makes me feel like I have a lot more time to get you the show, which means I don’t do it. And also, the Wi-Fi speed here is okay, but it’s not great for uploading YouTube videos. So I’m behind in uploading a couple of the YouTube videos of the podcast in case you watch on that, I apologize for that. I keep meaning to do it when we go to bed so that it can be the only thing using the internet when we go to sleep, but I’m tired, and I have forgotten every night, for a week. So, I’m feeling pretty relaxed and my brain is showing that I really, really love being here. I love the walks that I’m taking through the rain and through the sun and just being surrounded by this much beauty is incredible. Also, it has cemented our belief that when we do eventually settle down, we want to settle down within walking distance of a cafe and/or a grocery store.

[00:04:01] For the last 15 years, before we moved here, we had to drive at least 20 minutes to get to somewhere to get anything. And you know, we’re back to that and that’s awesome. And we drive through the most gorgeous countryside you’ve ever seen in order to get coffee or to go to the grocery store, but I’m ready to just walk. We had those six beautiful days in Auckland where we walked everywhere and got everything and this was pre-lockdown. So no masks, everybody inside, it just felt normal for a while. I know that there’s a lot of talk about what’s going on in New Zealand with the lockdowns. Right now, the goal is elimination of coronavirus, which is what they have done a couple of times successfully before by a total lockdown, keeping it out of the country.

[00:04:52] There was an article in the New York Times this morning saying, “Can New Zealand really do it?”, because the Delta strain is so much more easily spread. I don’t know. I don’t think they’re going to keep us in lockdown forever if we can’t corale it. But, to be fair, we had one case. It, what was it about, a week and a half ago, and that’s one, maybe two weeks ago, when we locked down. We had one case in the community. It is now up to 700 cases. And I was like, oh my God, that’s so many. And all of those people have been, you know, quarantined. They’re all there, I think there’s 20 people in the hospital. No one has died. Only 26 people have died of COVID, total, since coronavirus started in New Zealand. And, in kind of a comparison last night, I was curious and I pulled up the states that are closest in size to New Zealand, New Zealand has 5 million people. Alabama and Minnesota both have about a million people. Alabama, yesterday, reported almost 5,000 cases in one day. We have 700 cases in the country, total. Of course, you know, that’s Alabama.

[00:06:00] So it’s a little bit different from Minnesota. They reported 1400 cases in one day. We’ve had 700 cases over the course of two weeks and all of those people are being tracked and monitored. Everyone in the country is being tracked and monitored and that might fly, that might not fly so well in the United States. We really have a group of people in New Zealand who are willing to turn on their Bluetooth, willing to use the COVID tracer app, wherever they go. And that is why I, I’m still hopeful that we can stamp out Delta here. If not, they’re rolling out the vaccines as fast as they can. About 25% of the population now is vaccinated. Everybody, almost everybody, wants to be vaccinated. Of course, there are some anti-vaxxers. There’s one guy protesting in Auckland a few days ago. Just one guy, they gave him a ticket. 

[00:06:57] They were the last developed nation to get the vaccine, New Zealand was, because they didn’t really have much need of it. Could they have done a better job at getting the vaccine in? Probably, I don’t know. I don’t profess to know much about New Zealand politics, although I am trying to learn. So people are very, very eager to get the vaccine so that Delta being out and in the society would be not acceptable because it’s not acceptable, but a little bit better and a little bit less scary for them. New Zealanders are scared of this as, I can’t even imagine, like when Delta came out, everyone I knew had the vaccine, so at least we knew that if we got it, we wouldn’t get it sick and go to the hospital and die. But, right now, the vast majority of new Zealanders don’t have the vaccine and they, we don’t need Delta raging through the community. But, anyway, that’s enough of that. I just find it really interesting and still so fascinating to watch the response here and how everybody just pulls together. It’s unreal. It really, really is. It’s wonderful to see. 

[00:08:06] I would like to quickly thank new patrons, Mary Poliath and Mary M. Barnett. Hello, Mary. Sarah McKenzie and Carol and Cecilia, what a pretty name. I apologize if I mispronounce any of those, I just got a visual migraine while we’ve been sitting here. So while I’m looking at the camera, I can’t really see it. It just looks like lightning. Visual migraines don’t always go along with pain migraines in my life. So I’m hoping I don’t get one of those cause I don’t feel migraine-y at all. And oh, speaking of Patreon, I will say that I am a proud and happy member of Becca Syme’s Patreon. And you know how I feel about Becca Syme. If you have not heard my interview with Becca Syme, S-Y-M-E go back, find that, listen to it. I love her. And, I will say that the, one of the reasons I didn’t write this morning is that I’m taking her Facebook ads for intuitives, of course. Which is basically, make an ad somewhere and then track it intuitively, not looking at a hundred different numbers and cost per click and all of those other things. Here’s how you look at it intuitively. And I’m loving it. I actually created a Facebook ad this morning and it was fun to do. So I am thinking about that and if you are looking for a person to become a patron of, number one, you can look at me at $5 and up. I’m your mini coach. You know that at $1 and up I’m eternally grateful. That’s Rachaelherron.com/ no, it’s not. It’s at patreon.com/Rachael. But after that, really consider patronizing Becca Syme. You can just find her by searching Patreon – Becca Syme. She’s definitely the person I love being a patron of most. She provides so much value to her patrons. I just wanted to give a non-sponsored, non-affiliated plug for that. I just love everything she does. So, you might want to check her out. 

[00:10:14] In the meantime, let us just get into the interview with Cassandra. I know you’re going to enjoy it. I hope you are getting some writing done, my friends, visual migraine, or not. Actually, you know what, if you have a visual migraine, just go lie on the floor till it passes because it will. Oh, I am feeling scattered today and I will just tell you my favorite visual migraine story in 30 seconds or less. The very first time I ever got a visual migraine, I was about 25 and I had just curled my eyelashes for the first time. It was a total coincidence, but I thought I had made myself blind by curling my eyelashes and it was a very scary morning. Now I scrub my eyelashes every day because that’s one of the things I like to do and I don’t normally get visual migraines. Okay. That is all. I’m silly today. It’s the coffee. All right, my friends, happy writing to you. 

[00:11:06] Hey, you’re a writer. Did you know that I send out a free weekly email of writing encouragement? Go sign up for it at www.rachaelherron.com/write  and you’ll also get my Stop Stalling and Write PDF with helpful tips you can use today to get some of your own writing done. Okay, now onto the interview. 

[00:11:23] Rachael Herron: Well, I could not be more pleased to welcome to the show, Cassandra Lane. Hello, Cassandra!

[00:11:29] Cassandra Lane: Hi, Rachael, how are you? 

[00:11:31] Rachael Herron: I’m so glad to talk to you, I’m so excited. Let me give you a little bit of an introduction here. Cassandra Lane is a writer and editor based in Los Angeles. Lane received her MFA from Antioch University LA, Louisiana. Louisiana?

[00:11:44] Cassandra Lane: No, at Los Angeles. 

[00:11:45] Rachael Herron: Oh, it’s actually LA, okay. Her stories have appeared in the New York Times’ Conception series, the Times-Picayune, the Atlanta Journal Constitution, and elsewhere. Her debut memoir, We Are Bridges was published in 2021 by Feminist Press. She is editor in chief of L.A. Parent magazine and formerly served on the board of the AROHO Foundation. What’s the AROHO Foundation?

 [00:12:07] Cassandra Lane: It’s A Room of Her Own.

 [00:12:08] Rachael Herron: Oh, I did not know that. Well, let’s start off by saying I’m a memoir junkie. 

[00:12:18] Cassandra Lane: Oh, yeah. 

[00:12:19] Rachael Herron: Absolutely. It’s just probably my favorite genre to read and to write, and We Are Bridges was just absolutely stunning. 

[00:12:27] Cassandra Lane: Thank you so much.

[00:12:28] Rachael Herron: It was haunting, it was traumatic, it was about trauma, generational trauma. And you just did such an incredible job, and I felt honored to walk with you through that and kind of see things through your eyes. So thank you so much for writing it. At the end of the show, I want you to tell people what it is and what it is about.

[00:12:52] Cassandra Lane: Okay.

[00:12:53] Rachael Herron: But, as we get started, as we normally do, let’s talk about process because you sound very busy. How do you write, how do you get it done? Where does it live inside your busy life?

 [00:13:10] Cassandra Lane: Oh my God. Well, thank you so much first for your lovely words about the book.

[00:13:14] Rachael Herron: I loved it.

[00:13:15] Cassandra Lane: That’s taken me forever to write. 

[00:13:16] Rachael Herron: Yeah. 

[00:13:17] Cassandra Lane: When I saw your, I think it’s a class, or a book that you wrote about writing in 45 days, what is it, 48 hours? 

[00:13:23] Rachael Herron:  45 days and yeah, no, 45 hours, and it is the crappiest first draft and mostly that’s over the course of many weeks.

[00:13:30] Cassandra Lane: Okay. But I was like, oh my gosh, I need this book. So for me, yes, it’s been a very long process. I mean, I started the first seeds of this in maybe 2002. So, almost 20 years. 

[00:13:44] Rachael Herron: Yeah.

[00:13:45] Cassandra Lane: I’ve always pretty much worked full time, very demanding jobs. So, just getting a little bit in, I get up really early for 4:30 in the morning.

[00:13:56] Rachael Herron: Ah, yes, you are the really early bird. 

[00:13:58] Cassandra Lane: Yeah. Yeah. And I have to, before the craziness of work, and once I became a mom, you know, parenting begins. 

[00:14:06] Rachael Herron: How old are your kids or kid?

[00:14:08] Cassandra Lane: My son now is 13. So yeah 

[00:14:11] Rachael Herron: You’ve had 13, very busy years. 

[00:14:15] Cassandra Lane: Absolutely. And I have two bonus sons who are now adults. So, at one point, you know, we had more kids in the house. So, yeah, it’s just been very, it’s very challenging. So I really cherish those dark early morning hours, lighting my candles, my incense, and just hoping no one moves.

[00:14:40] Rachael Herron: I’ve talked to mothers who are like, and I try not to move my body at all, the only thing moving are my fingers because if they hear anything else, I’m just doomed. Talk to us a little bit more about setting the stage for your, the process of writing because I love to hear the particulars about like what kind of candles is, what kind of, are you listening to music what’s going on at the desk when you do this?

[00:14:59] Cassandra Lane: Oh, absolutely. You know, I love music so much, but, and I have to write a playlist for the book shortly here and I was like, you know, I don’t, I love music and there’s music in the book, but I don’t necessarily listen. I don’t really listen to music while I’m writing. I need silence. So I like to hear, you know, the early morning birds outside, I love any sort of candle that has like tobacco scents, vanilla.

[00:15:26] Rachael Herron: And DHS?

[00:15:28] Cassandra Lane: DHS?

[00:15:29] Rachael Herron: Yes. 

[00:15:30] Cassandra Lane: I don’t know that one.

 [00:15:31] Rachael Herron: Look up the DHS candles because they have a ton of tobacco-y ones, and they’re only like $12. 

[00:15:36] Cassandra Lane: Oh, cool! Okay. I’m there. Amber is another smell that I’m just absolutely addicted to. I wear Amber and I will put some, you know, Amber oil my skin before I come into my writing room and I’ll light Amber candles. I found this great, fairly new cafe in my neighborhood called south LA cafe. And they have a candle called Create. And I don’t remember. I know it’s Garden, I think it’s Gardenia and vanilla, and there’s some musky scent too, and I just became addicted to the smell.

[00:16:06] Rachael Herron: That’s perfect!

[00:16:07] Cassandra Lane: I know.

[00:16:08] Rachael Herron: Like Gardenia is my favorite, the musky is my favorite, I want that candle, and it’s called Create?

[00:16:12] Cassandra Lane: Yes, it’s addictive. And I’ve gone the last few times, get in and they were out and I was so upset. 

[00:16:20] Rachael Herron: I get very attached to my candles. Very.

[00:16:23] Cassandra Lane: Yes, and I was like, I got that. It’s interesting, I think I have different scents for different phases. So when I was in a very final phase of the production, that’s the candle that got me through. And I went to get it, those last few times they didn’t have it.

[00:16:38] Rachael Herron: Like not, completely unacceptable. So let me ask you about the long timeframe of sitting with this book, because I’ve talked to people who, how did, how did the book change over time? 

[00:16:51] Cassandra Lane: So, well, I’ll start with the title. I feel like it’s had a hundred different titles.

[00:16:55] Rachael Herron: Yeah.

[00:16:56] Cassandra Lane: And those titles were, I think, you know, driven by what I thought the book was about at the time, which has matured as I’ve matured. You know, I thought the book initially, when I first started, I wasn’t even planning on becoming a mom. I was just going to help other people with their kids. And so I just thought, oh, this is an exploration about what happened to my ancestor, Burt Bridges who was lynched, and that was the premise. I would go to this cemetery that was near my apartment, you know, imagine his life, imagine his, his murder. And I was just so obsessed with that story and thought that that was going to be, that I was going to resurrect him and tell his story. And at some point, I became, I reached a roadblock. There were no records about his life. My great grandmother whom I remember, very well, was not, she was, she did not want to talk about him. After much badgering over the years, she finally revealed his name to my grandfather who knew that the man she was married to and who beat him so much and didn’t love him. He eventually knew that that wasn’t his biological father. She told him, and she told him his real father was Burt Bridges and that he was lynched. And then my mom became obsessed with finding out who her father’s biological father was. And she told my mom just a little bit more, you know, and that’s how we found out that he was so fine and beautiful. And she was absolutely still in love with him, even on her death bed, crying about him and their love. So,

[00:18:34] Rachael Herron: How can you not write that story?

[00:18:36] Cassandra Lane: I know! I know. I know. And I remember my grandfather. I was a little girl and didn’t understand, you’ve read the book. Why this 80 something year old man was in his recliner after he retired. I think, you know, he’d been so busy working such physically hard jobs for all those decades. And once he was forced to retire from chopping down trees in the woods, he had all this time on his hands and he didn’t have any hobbies and he would just go over his entire life and I remembered him crying about how he didn’t know his real daddy and his stepdaddy beat him so bad and I just didn’t understand like what happened and didn’t really get interested in asking the questions until of course I was older, a young woman. And I think when I first heard Billie Holiday singing strange fruit or fruit, it haunted me so much. And that’s when I started connecting the dots that, oh, this is, this impacted my family. 

[00:19:36] Rachael Herron: Yeah, your direct, your direct bloodline.

[00:19:38] Cassandra Lane: Absolutely. 

[00:19:39] Rachael Herron: Directly to you. So how did that change? How did the writing of the book change when you became a mother?  A biological mother?

[00:19:45] Cassandra Lane: I think I started looking at, I was so focused on the men and that kind of, you know, my, I, wasn’t going to take the motherhood path and I kind of aligned with the men in the family, which, who seemed to be more free to me. And, you know, even though they were married, they’d had certain freedoms that the women didn’t seem to have. So I think I had, I was sort of taking the women for granted and undervaluing them, and saw their child-rearing is burdensome. It’s something that I just didn’t want to take on. So, becoming a mom helped me, well pregnancy really, just look at the turn the lens on great-grandma Mary, as the survivor, a very strong survivor at that. She was a farmer, she fed people who were poorer than she was, and she had cooked this amazing food that I remember. And so that’s, once I’ve reached that roadblock and, you know, for some years, kind of left the story alone. When I think when I became pregnant, I really started to see grandma, great grandma Mary, as well as my grandmother and my mother in a different way and appreciate what they had and the strength that they had. And I started telling those stories. 

[00:20:57] Rachael Herron: That’s beautifully, beautifully said. Thank you. What is the most difficult part of writing for you?

[00:21:06] Cassandra Lane: Having to go to those deep places. I keep saying one day, I’m going to write a humor, comedy or something, I don’t know. 

[00:21:14] Rachael Herron: I bet you that you will go deep into it anyway. Like, it would be all comedy, but then you would dive straight for like, this is hard. Let’s look at it.

[00:21:24] Cassandra Lane: In fact, some people have been asking me, okay, what’s next? And even my, from my editor and I had this idea that I thought was going to be next. And as soon as the book hit the shelves and people started reading it and including family, a cousin, first cousin came to me, he read it in a day and just wrote this long letter telling me about something that happened that was also racially, that he believes was racially motivated. And it’s contemporary times.

[00:21:52] Rachael Herron: Wow. 

[00:21:53] Cassandra Lane: The death of his father, my uncle David, and how they believed that that was not an accident. 

[00:21:58] Rachael Herron: Oh, no.

[00:21:59] Cassandra Lane: And then I dreamed about it that night. So I was like, uh-oh, here we go. You know? And I’ve worked, so I’m talking to him about, you know, what happened to the investigation and what’s the real story. And I have a sneaky suspicion that that’s what I’m going to be pursuing next, despite my desire to write this light, friendship.

[00:22:20] Rachael Herron: You are being drawn forward into this. That is fascinating. 

[00:22:25] Cassandra Lane: Yeah. So even though that kind of writing and the subject matter is heavy and hard, for some reason, I’m drawn to that. And I think when you ask what’s difficult about it, what’s difficult is having to pull myself out, you know, and we have this small amount of time to work on it. And it’s hard to get back into those deep places.

[00:22:43] Rachael Herron: Well, yeah. There’s a word kept coming to me when I was reading too is that you’re just kind of ferocious about being able to look at these things and that takes an emotional toll and then it’s 5:30 in the morning and then you got to start the day. 

[00:22:56] Cassandra Lane: Yeah, exactly. I’m like, okay, I gotta act normal now.

[00:23:03] Rachael Herron: What is your biggest joy when it comes to writing? 

[00:23:06] Cassandra Lane: When a sentence, when I can get a sentence to sing, I love the revision process.

[00:23:11] Rachael Herron: Me too. 

[00:23:12] Cassandra Lane: I’m crazy. I’m like, I just love it because you’re not just, I don’t feel like I, when I speak, it’s not exactly how I wanted it to be when you first write. And so writing and not being under deadline because I’ve, I have a career, I’ve been a journalist, I’m an editor. So I constantly have to write under the line. So writing a creative project, especially outside, when you’re not under contract, allows me that time to slow down. I’m a slow thinker, a slow reader, and revision allows me the chance to really just go deep. I like cooking pot of gumbo, something that’s not a can of soup. It just takes a long and it always tastes better the next day or so. So,

[00:23:54] Rachael Herron: I love to do any of that, like in the magazine business, like,

[00:23:58] Cassandra Lane: Our newspaper, no.

[00:23:59] Rachael Herron: It’s just go, go, go, go, go. Yeah.

[00:24:02] Cassandra Lane: Exactly. 

[00:24:03] Rachael Herron: Can you share a tip of any sort with our listeners? 

[00:24:09] Cassandra Lane: I love poetry. Well, I love my poet friends and I love, I’m not a poet. And so I don’t even understand how it works, but what’s really helped me, just in recent years is reading poetry. Wouldn’t that, I’m such an early morning person that I can’t stay up late and read in bed, like I envision all these writers doing. So I keep by on my nightstand are just books of poetry. Patricia’s Blood Dazzler, Richard Bieben; A Late Beloved Friend, his book with the heart ways. And so, I don’t know, a few minutes that I have before I’m knocked out, I will read a poem, Jericho Brown, and, I love hearing poets, also read their poetry out loud. I think that musicality has influenced my work. My mother’s a musician, and so it reminds me of that, you know, the texture and the musicality of their voices, how resonant they are. So I encourage prose writers to listen to poets and to read poetry. 

[00:25:09] Rachael Herron: So just this year, I have finally, I took a poetry class after being like, after having poetry beaten out of me and in grad school, I just never thought I could do it again. And I thought I wasn’t a poet. And so, I don’t know, I’m hearing like I’m hearing in your voice, you love poetry. You’re a writer. Is there a poet’s heart under there that you just, and you’re not writing poetry now?

[00:25:31] Cassandra Lane: I just see it as I’m a lover. Like, I feel it feels so sacred to me that I dare not 

[00:25:36] Rachael Herron: That’s the way, that’s the way I felt. And then I took this really playful, small class, just a month long class, and it broke everything open because I thought, I thought it was too sacred to do. I thought just that I wasn’t a good enough writer. 

[00:25:48] Cassandra Lane: How interesting. I’ll have to, if that’s an ongoing workshop, I’ll have to look at that

[00:25:53] Rachael Herron: I’ll send you the, I’ll say it’s Mona Mcdermott and I’ll send you the information because she really kind of changed my life with this class and allowing me to be a poet because I’m kind of like you have, I’d only ever read poetry and let it fill me, but I didn’t know I could feel myself with it too. 

[00:26:06] Cassandra Lane: I love that. That’s beautiful. So any poetry books in your…? 

[00:26:11] Rachael Herron: Definitely not. No, I’m not there. No, I can barely write it, but it is, it does feel really good to write it too.

[00:26:19] Cassandra Lane: I’m totally open to if it’s and I like that, how to enter it through the door of play as prose. 

[00:26:27] Rachael Herron: Yeah. And I’m always trying to like, get stuff done. So also I’m like, well, maybe this will improve my prose. And in fact it will, you know, but that gives me permission to enter it. And I really love like the way you just lit up when you were talking about poetry. So I dunno, I dunno. It’s none of my business, but, that’s what I’m thinking. Okay. What thing in your life affects your writing in a surprising way?

[00:26:52] Cassandra Lane: A positive?

[00:26:53] Rachael Herron: Anyway, positive, negative. 

[00:27:03] Cassandra Lane: I think, you know, I think being a mom and now I’m a new pet parent too, which I don’t know if that’s a thing.

[00:27:11] Rachael Herron: Ooh, what kind of animal? 

[00:27:13] Cassandra Lane: It’s a Greyhound, he’s a Greyhound. He’s still a puppy, but he’s super tall and he’s beautiful, so beautiful. And so, yeah, it’s something about, you know, you’re thinking, oh, I have even less time now because I’m nurturing this child, this animal, but, there’s something about watching myself give to these other beings that reminds me that I need to give to my own self and parent myself, and part of my, you know, the thing that I’m most excited about with my own life is my writing. And so, I try to mirror or find ways to mirror that, that parenting with my writing and treatment. And that’s why I always, you know, call it book baby. I know we all do that. A lot of us do that anyway, but I’ve want to treat it in that way, like I’m not, I can’t like leave this baby or the next baby alone. It’s time for me to spend some time with them too. And parenting reminds me of that. In fact, I think I valued more than I did before I was a parent, things that I took for granted are now very precious that time. 

[00:28:18] Rachael Herron: That is absolutely gorgeous. I love that. What is the best book that you’ve read recently?

[00:28:24] Cassandra Lane: Oh my gosh. I love The Secret Lives of Church Ladies. I know it’s all the rage, right now. 

[00:28:30] Rachael Herron: I haven’t even heard of it. I think I’m out of the time, The Secret Lives of Church Ladies. That sounds amazing.

[00:28:34] Cassandra Lane: Lives of church ladies. I grew up in the church, black, traditional black church. And the cover, I don’t have it right here by me, but the cover is just this woman.

[00:28:44] Rachael Herron: Please tell me it has a hat or two. 

[00:28:46] Cassandra Lane: It doesn’t, but just she’s buttoned with a bow and it’s,

[00:28:49] Rachael Herron: Oh, yes, yes. 

[00:28:51] Cassandra Lane: And so it’s a book of short stories, and it’s about these black women who, you know, in some way, they’re tied to the church and they take certain risks. It’s very daring. They’re very funny moments, very, I just love the writing, very tight. It’s by Deesha Philyaw. So that short, book of short stories and also another debut, a book of short stories called Eat The Mouth That Feeds You by Fragoza, very strange and delicious, and fascinating. The way she telling these stories, I mean, the title in and of itself and the title story is like, it makes you cringe, but also can’t turn away.

[00:29:34] Rachael Herron: Ooh, that’s kind of some of my favorite writing when that happens. Okay. I think you’ve told us quite a bit about the book, but tell us a little bit more about where it can be found, where you can be found.

[00:29:51] Cassandra Lane: So it can be found on all of the channels. I love supporting my local bookstores. So I encourage people. You don’t have to buy from mine, which include reparations club as salon, skylight books, but whatever, wherever you are, you know, support your local bookstore, if you can. And it is called

[00:30:08] Rachael Herron: And it is called We Are Bridges, where you want to remember. 

[00:30:10] Cassandra Lane: Yes, published by the Feminist Press, just in April, the week of my birthday. So it was the,

[00:30:15] Rachael Herron: Oh my gosh!

[00:30:16] Cassandra Lane: Birthday book baby was, it was super special. And then my website is cassandralane.net, and I’m on all the social channels as well, Cassandra Lane (T:casslanewrites, F:cassandralaneauthor, I:cassandra.lane71)     

[00:30:29] Rachael Herron: It has been a delight talking to you. Thank you for your book. I really, really loved it. And I just wish you happy writing as you move forward into the next, not light yet project.

[00:30:45] Cassandra Lane: This has been wonderful. Thank you so much. 

Thanks so much for joining me on this episode of “How do you Write?” You can reach me on Twitter, twitter.com/RachaelHerron, or at my website, www.rachaelherron.com, you can also support me on Patreon and get essays on living your creative life for as little as a buck an essay at www.patreon.com/rachael spelled R, A, C, H, A, E, L and do sign up for my free weekly newsletter of encouragement to writers rachaelherron.com/write/

Now, go to your desk and create your own process and get to writing my friends.